We are still in limbo waiting to hear back from our mortgage broker on what kind of mortgage deals he can get for us, and also from our builder, on what is going on with our building permit. I expected to hear from him today, and since I didn't, there is a good chance that the county is screwing with us again and has gone against their word and found another issue.

You see, we had the surveyor do the stupid cross hatching on our site plan like they wanted, wasting an additional week of our time, and our builder picked up the survey and took it to the county. They still didn't like it, so he made the ridiculous changes they wanted and took it back again. He walked it around to every single department out there that has any say in permitting and got a verbal approval from each of them that they did not have a problem with it. The fact that we still do not have the damn permit means something else must have gone wrong. Our builder gets just as frustrated with them as we do and sometimes doesn't even tell us of their antics until he has them resolved because he knows it would just upset us, and would be unproductive.

Anyway, we are still waiting and even if we get the permit this week, we have to really pray that something will give with the mortgage thing. Right now it isn't looking good. Due to the housing market being shitty, and the fact that mortgage companies are going out of business left and right, the appraisers are being extremely conservative on their assessments, appraising new construction such as ours for far less than the cost to build it. Because of this, we will have to come up with either $26,000 or $11,000, or somewhere in between depending on what the mortgage broker is able to find. Obviously $11,000 would be easier to gather, but will still be difficult. $26,000 is probably impossible for us right now, short of selling a kidney. Please keep us in your prayers because we'll need them.

I'll keep you posted.

After everything else that we have been put through trying to build our house, now that the market for houses is way way down, we can't get the money we need to build, at least not without bringing more than $25,000 to the table. That would have been fine two years ago, before we were raped for nearly $50,000 just to be able to build, but now it is not going to happen. So, I don't know how things will work out. I was alerted to this issue via an email from our mortgage broker this evening, and this was my response:

We do not have $15,000 plus closing costs to put down. Two years ago, before the Florida Department of Environmental Protection, the Army Corps of Engineers, the St. Johns River Water Management District, the State of Florida Environmental Health Department, and the county royally screwed us, we did have that money to put down. But now, sadly no.

Over the past two years of hemorrhaging money, we have pissed away approximately:

$25,000 in interest to hold the property while the county screwed around and toyed with us over such BS as cross hatching on the site plan
$12,000 in legal fees to get a waiver to build when the county commission should have granted it to us without a lawyer as we met all of their criteria to the nth degree
$9,000 towards a road that couldn't be built

These are just the major expenses- there are tons of smaller ones that we have incurred due to the incompetence of the people working at the county and the other regulatory agencies. They would ask a stupid question, then it would take $500 worth of talking to our environmental permitting company to satisfy them. Or they would decide that we had to have the conservation easement cross-hatched on the site plan, and that it had to be done by the surveyor and that would set us back even further (haven't gotten the bill for that one yet, but it is coming). Plus, we have about $35,000 down on the land itself.

Sorry if this is more information than you wanted. Please see what you can do with the other lenders.

If you can't find anyone to do the mortgage without money down, I guess we'll have to just give up and forget the whole thing. There are no other options; we are at the end of our rope. I don't know how anything gets built in this county.

I have been absent from this blog for the past few days, partly because i have been busy, but mostly because I had no access to post on it. Something went screwy with Movable Type (imagine that!) and I got an error page whenever I navigated to the blogging interface, saying that the directory was not found, or something like that. It is fixed now, but something really has to be done about this blog. I want to convert over to WordPress or something that is not riddled with "issues" like MT is, but I do not have the technical knowledge to attempt it myself. Oh well.

So, what have I been up to lately? The past two Saturdays we have had someone come in and reglaze our shower and our tub surround. They have this process where they etch the tile, then they spray what is essentially like an enamel glaze over it, changing the color of the tile and filling in little cracks and voids. Our shower and tub surround were not in terrible shape, but were covered in cheap grey tile. When the shower was tiled, they did a really crappy job of grouting it, and some of the unfired edges of the tiles could be seen at the grout lines making it look like it was dirty all of the time. The floor of the shower was a lost cause; we had never seen it look halfway decent. There were also two tiles in the shower that had fine cracks in them radiating out from where they had been cut to go around the sill at the bottom of the shower. The tub surround had its own issues: two edge tiles that had popped off because they hadn't used enough mortar, one tile that had the ceramic surface chipped at the corner, some holes drilled in a few tiles where a shower door had been installed before we removed it, and the grey no longer matched anything in the room after we replaced the vanity last year.

We couldn't fix the edge tiles that had come loose because one of them had split in half and they were so thin that we couldn't find any that would match without sticking out. The tile store people said they were Brazilian tiles and that they are no longer made. We had a few extra of the tiles, but not the edge pieces, so Andy cut them to the same size as the edge pieces and installed them. The holes in the tiles were filled with Bondo and sanded smooth. Then the whole thing was sprayed with white enamel glaze. We went with white because it looks clean and is very neutral so it should appeal to the widest range of buyers when we go to sell in a few months. We had to do something to make the bathrooms look their best- the glazing has a five year warranty and it only took about half a day to complete each bathroom. Way easier than chipping out all of that tile and redoing it. This way it looks nice and is functional with no problems for a prospective buyer, ad if they so choose, they can tear out the tile and redo it. We just couldn't go that route with everything else we have going on right now.

These pictures show the before and after of the master bathroom- I'll post pics of the downstairs bath once we get everything back together. We still need to reinstall the faucet handle, shower head, shower curtain rod, etc.

It is an unusual experience working at a place as far removed from the rest of the world as I do, with only a couple of different routes in and out. I take the south route into the space center, but no matter the route, the roads in and out of KSC are referred to as the "NASA 500" at shift change times, due to the vast numbers of cars racing in and out of the center at lightning speeds.

There is a funny little old man that works out there in a support function that causes him to have to come to our area every once in a while. The guys all call him "Road Rage" because of his behavior on the road when they see him on the way home. From all accounts, if he gets boxed in or can't pass, the mild-mannered, quiet little man turns all shades of crimson and beats his fist on the dashboard as he screams obscenities. The guys try to box him in sometimes just to see him erupt.

It is weird to try to imagine this little old dude as someone with that much anger, yet somehow- he is. It just proves that you should be careful who you piss off while driving, because they could be a quiet little psycho like our Road Rage, and jump out of the car only to rip your head off. I think driving in heavy traffic breeds a whole new variety of temporary psychosis itself. Public Service Message: Be wary of the person in the vehicle next to yours; you never know what they are capable of.

In some of my side endeavors at work, the ones that go beyond my normal responsibilities, I have been interfacing with some people in different areas and disciplines than myself, so-called experts in their field. On the company website several of them have their "bios" listed with all of their past accomplishments, awards, and histories. Most of the bios sound quite impressive and make them sound as though they really know what they are doing and have tons of experience. I look at these bios and find them laughable, as I have worked with these people enough to know that they are not experts, and that they don't even know the basics of their field. As far as their years of experience, they must have slept through most of them, because they learned nothing. I know this because I do know their field quite well. It is really kind of sad, actually.

I wondered why they kept getting upset with me for questioning things at meetings, and now I know it is because my questions were things they didn't know the answers to but should have, and I was inadvertently highlighting their incompetence. But it is not limited to just incompetence; these people have no desire to learn, either. You would think that if someone showed them up in their supposed field of expertise that they would make a point of studying up and ensuring that they knew what the answers were for the next meeting at the very least. But they are apathetic; they don't research, and they end up looking stupid again at the next meeting. Whatever. I can't help someone that won't help himself.

The deceptive praise for these employees in their bios on the company website just goes to show that even if a person has a fantastic bio, or resume, or recommendation letter, they can still be a worthless lump. It is all about the creative writing of the resume author, it seems, and many people have help with their resumes, so you aren't even guaranteed to get a creative writer by selecting someone with an impressive resume. It must be very difficult from the standpoint of someone that is hiring people to wade through all the bullshit and figure out which candidates for a job are actually worth a damn. Hmm.

This may sound a little sick and twisted to many of you who are freezing your collective asses off in much of the US right now, but eating ice cream in the middle of winter is completely normal for us in the South.

I am fairly ecstatic at the newfound availability of the tastiest substance on earth, Key Lime Pie ice cream.

My favorite local grocery store had it as a store brand of ice cream starting, as far as I know, about two years ago. It was seasonal, though, and after a few months it disappeared, causing me great disappointment.

After at least a year and a half of absence, the best ice cream flavor in the world has suddenly returned, complete with its chunks of graham cracker crust. Oh, the wondrousness that is Key Lime Pie ice cream. I have informed Andy that we need to purchase a chest freezer in order to stock up to last me through the next Key Lime Pie ice cream hiatus. It has been a long year and a half without it.

No, it is not the house, sadly, as we were supposed to start construction today, but that will probably happen later this week. Believe it or not, we are held up right now because of some cross-hatching the county wants on our survey. Cross-hatching which is there, on the drawing, but since our builder drew it on there, very neatly and well scaled, it is no good. The county says that the surveyor has to do the cross-hatching. I kid you not.

Oh, so back to the construction zone, thing. That is in reference to this blog, which will be moving to a new blogging platform in the very near future. So don't mind the construction debris and dust, I'll get things cleaned up around here soon enough and have everything working as soon as possible.

Okay, I will admit that I am not a ray of sunshine at every moment, but I think that most of the time I manage to remain as optimistic as possible without being completely unrealistic. Unfortunately I share a working area with someone who could be described as an "Eeyore," someone who sucks the energy out of a room with his negativity.

I didn't even realize it at first, but after several months of hearing the deep sighs and the daily incarnation of "woe is me" for whatever reason, it finally became very clear to me what the problem is. My co-worker, Mr. Negativity, is not only negative about everything in his own life, he also does his best to rain on my parade whenever he can. Actually, it's more like he shits all over my parade, but whatever.

I have known people before that did not like their jobs and were very negative about work related things, but at least they had things in their lives that did make them happy, so they weren't all doom and gloom all of the time. But not Mr. Negativity. I have never heard him say anything positive about anything- even having time off from work will make him complain about all of the work he has to do at home when he's off. Then when he comes back to work he'll complain about having to come back. He could win the lottery and would still bitch about the taxes. What do you even say to someone like that?

Now I realize that there are problems that come up from time to time, but I don't know why he can't ever see them as I do. When a work problem comes up, I think of it as a chance to innovate, to come up with a creative solution. I just get worn down having to listen to his defeatist attitude all of the time. The person who used to work with Mr. Negativity before I did was moved out of our area over a year ago, and went from being someone that just dragged himself into work each day and did what he had to, to someone that has gone on to do great things and inspire others in his new group. He had become stagnant while working with Mr. Negativity, and now I can see exactly why. To see how he changed so much with the only real difference being that he was removed from the constant pessimism is a testament to the powers of negative thinking. I don't want to get caught in that downward spiral, so I am going to have to focus myself on being even more positive to counteract him.

Maybe I'll try something new on Monday. When he first makes a negative comment, I'll suggest we try a little game. We'll see if he can go for an hour without saying anything negative. He might take offense to that, but maybe he needs to hear it so that he will wake up and realize how he comes across. I'll make an experiment out of it, to see if positivity can win out over negativity. I'll let you know how it turns out.

I spent most of yesterday evening working on my resume. I meant to post, but it took a lot longer than I thought it would to put together something that looked halfway decent. I hate writing those things because it is so hard to promote yourself without sounding like a cheese ball. I haven't updated my resume in over five years, even though I know it would be smart to keep it up to date all of the time. Do you keep your resume updated in case an opportunity arises, or would you have to scramble to put something together? What kind of things do you have in the "profile" or "objective section at the top, or do you eve have that section? That is the worst part to write, in my opinion.

We have so very much outgrown this house. Add to that the fact that we are storing all kinds of spoils and plunder for the new house, acquired through my bargain madness, and you have a whole room full o' crap, and several other portions of rooms stacked with boxes o' crap. Well, not really crap, good stuff I got cheap.

As requested, here are some photos of some of my great deals. The Pottery Barn wrought iron headboard was $10.50, and the matching bench was $21.57. A similar headboard is on sale at Pottery Barn for $549. While mine is an slightly different wrought iron pattern that they don't sell anymore, I think it was a tremendous deal. The Whirlpool cooktop and wall oven, both new, were $430. The entry door handleset and deadbolt was $39.99. These and many other items are stacked quite high in our room full o' crap.

I have become quite the bargain hunter, and this weekend was taken up with collecting my spoils. Friday afternoon we picked up a brand new wall oven and cooktop that I found on Craig's List for a super cheap price, and then today we drove down to South Florida to pick up a gorgeous Pottery Barn wrought iron headboard and matching bench that I won on eBay for the new house. The headboard was ten dollars and change and the bench was just over twenty-one bucks. A hell of a deal.

After over a year of looking at our house and workshop site plans, the building department at the county suddenly decided that we can't have things the way that they are as the workshop is set farther forward than the front wall of the house. Of course, they didn't figure this out until the eleventh hour right when we are trying to get the final permit released after they had assured us that everything was fine for months.

We totally understand why the regulations call for the "accessory buildings" to be situated behind the front wall of the principle structure, because in structured neighborhoods they don't want people building sheds and such in front of their house and junking up the area. In our case, none of it is visible from the road, so who freaking cares? No one can see our house or workshop as they are 500 feet off the road and the property is very wooded. We are the only people that will ever be able to see back there. The workshop had to be located where we put it because of all of the environmental issues.

The builder and I brainstormed separately but we both came up with the same option. If we connect the house and the workshop with a covered walkway, they are treated as one structure and we have no problems. So on Monday, that is the direction we will be taking.

It is always something.

When I sit at my desktop computer in my home "office," I am followed by an entourage of dogs. Michaela squishes herself under my desk and Annabel and Ramona lay on the floor around my chair. Sometimes Denny, Cody, and Louie come around too, but the girls are a constant. Tonight I was sitting there typing away on the puter and suddenly was overcome with rancid fumes. Dog fart fumes. I choked my way through them, and when I finally got some clean air to breathe, the stench came again. It was God awful, stifling, and pungent. I still don't know which girl was responsible, but I find it baffling that any dog's body could turn expensive, high quality dog food into such a nasty smell. That and why the putrid smells only seem to come from one dog at a time. Shouldn't the same food create similarly horrible smells from each dog? Maybe it is a blessing that it doesn't as I might have passed out from the noxious odors.

We are now having trouble getting our construction loan for the amount we need because home sales in our area have been so abysmal lately and the appraisers are forced to used past sale information to determine value. The completed value of our house has to come in at a certain minimum amount or they will not lend us enough to build it. Compounding the lack of comparable sales in the area is the fact that nothing that has sold and that is considered "comparable" is even remotely similar to our property, making comparisons difficult to to make with any kind of accuracy.

There were quite a few things on the appraisal of our finished home that did not seem to be correct, so our mortgage broker is going to question the appraiser about several items that don't seem to add up. He had me send him a list of different items to ask about. He will run down each line item with the appraiser in an effort to clear up the discrepancies.

We are getting pretty tired of the constant road blocks with our house project. On the other hand, notification of the the latest crisis didn't have the same effect as earlier crises did. I simply have gotten to the point that I cannot get freaked out when given the bad news every time because we always seem to get things worked out, and it isn't worth the mental anguish.

Just gimme my new house, already!

It is funny, when Hermann's tortoises are young it is almost impossible to tell if they are male or female. When we got Virgil, we just decided he was going to be a boy at least until we found out otherwise. To me, he looked like he had a boy's face. As he has gotten older and bigger, it was beginning to look like he was a boy, almost for certain. You are supposed to be able to tell from the width of the shell at the back- it is much wider in the boys.

When we got Emma, we hoped that whatever sex Virgil was, she would be the opposite, but again, there was no way to tell, so we arbitrarily decided she would be a girl until we found out otherwise. She does sort of look a little daintier and more feminine than him, but it could be wishful thinking.

Since the two torts have been introduced to each other and are living together, it appears that we may have been right on both counts, which is kind of surprising. Virgil was a bit baffled by Emma at first and ran from her, but she followed him everywhere. Now he chases her around. Andy says that Emma absolutely MUST be a girl, because she turned Virgil into an idiot. He is completely infatuated with her. He follows her around and tries to hump her. I think they are both too young for mating, but try to tell Virgil that. Isn't it crazy that we were almost certainly right on guessing the sexes of both of them from tiny hatchlings? What are the chances?

Today Andy and I visited the Orlando IKEA store for the first time, and to summarize that experience, Wow! It was a little like going to a theme park with the vast crowds and feeling like you are part of a herd of cattle as you shuffle through. Not that we didn't see some good stuff, we did, but the price you pay to go there is dealing with the crowds.

We made some mental notes and picked up some info on some wood shelving units that would be perfect in the closet of my craft room in the new house, saw some lighting that would work really well in our closets and the back area of the mudroom, found a cute little mirrored wood cabinet that would work well in one of the bathrooms, and found a full length mirror that I liked a lot for our room to replace the crummy one we have hanging on the door. We were not in buying mode because we still don't really have too much room to store things, but were really on more of an informational trip.

The place was completely insane with people, though they have it pretty well organized. Even the best organization can't compensate for the massive throngs of people coming through. Tourists, residents, whatever, they were all there, and speaking every language you could imagine. It wasn't too bad when we ducked out of the main aisles into the room setups to look around, but still there were people everywhere, pushing strollers, dragging whining kids along, etc. We are not really crowd people- we actually hate that kind of thing, but we can suck it up if need be, and we did. Still it was rather amazing the enormity of the place and how much stuff they had crammed in there. Stacey, I never saw where they had the cheap batteries, but I will take your word for it. We did see about everything else under the sun so it wouldn't surprise me.

At the very end of the line just before the checkout lanes, there was an "open box as-is" section and we ducked in there to do a quick once over. They happened to have the little wooden mirrored cabinet we had admired in the showroom upstairs all assembled and with nothing wrong with it. It was deeply discounted, so we bought it for one of the bathrooms in the new house. It never hurts to take advantage of a bargain. Plus, it didn't require any assembly at all, being that it was open box and already assembled. Even better.

So, overall it was a successful trip, but very exhausting. Are all IKEAs as absolutely insane with people as ours? I can't even imagine.

I went to see my doctor today; we discussed my dosage of medication as she has been trying me on some different things to combat fatigue from Fibromyalgia. I really like my doctor, and it isn't because she is necessarily the smartest or most knowledgeable, though she is very sharp. She listens to me, and even if I have found some information that is contrary to what she believes, she will look over it, and be very open minded. She says, "This is not a dictatorship," and I think that is great because so many doctors operate as if they know everything and you are just the stupid patient. She actually lets me have some input and I appreciate that immensely. What about you, do your doctors listen to you, or are they dictators?

We made it all the way through Christmas break and into the New Year with temperatures in the eighties. Now suddenly it is 35 degrees. Eeeek. We're all going to freeze (wimpy Floridians, you know).

This morning it was finally time for the torts to move into their new, larger home. Virgil had gotten too big for his old house that Andy built last Christmas and Emma's quarantine time was up so they got to move in together. They were so funny. As soon as we put them in the there they both peed, then each of them headed immediately up opposite stairways and met upstairs. Virgil didn't know what to think of her at first and he grabbed a leaf of escarole and carried it all over his new house; upstairs, downstairs and all over the place. Emma followed him the whole time, like his little shadow. They seem to be getting along fairly well so far. I think Emma is much more enamored with Virgil than the other way around, but that may change with time.

Update: Awwwww. Virgil went to sleep for the night upstairs in his hut and Emma squished in there with him just as close as can be and went to sleep snuggled up with him. It is the cutest thing.